There are few emotions more challenging than grief. Whether it is grieving a relationship that has come to an end, a crushing disappointment, the loss of a job or the passing of a loved one — grief is an emotion we all endure. If there is a little good news — Feng Shui can help you or someone you love during this time. Here are 13 Feng Shui tips to help support people in the midst of grief. Do not feel you have to all of them or even a few of them. You can pick one and move on as you feel interested, ready and available to do so.
#1 Avoid Still Objects, Photography, Art
In our homes we find objects, symbols and reminder of how we are feeling. When someone is grieving, especially for a considerably long term, we frequently find a number of images or reminders of things that don’t move at all or move very slowly.
When life is slow and still in a way that is not comfortable, this is when it is time to move these things out of sight – and ideally out of the house. If you would like to hold onto them, put them in a room you use less often and put a red piece of tape around them to cancel out their energy.
#2 Make Sure Your Clocks Work and Reflect the Correct Time
Often when people feel “stuck in time” you will find one, a few or many broken or poorly functioning clocks. To help get unstuck, get them repaired, buy new batteries, set the time correctly or simply get rid of them.
#3 Fix Leaks
Homes where there is substantial grief often have leaks. These can be in the form of leaky faucets, a leaky roof or more significant leaks elsewhere in your house. In Feng Shui, they symbolize that the grief is so significant that the home is (somewhat) literally crying. Get them fixed!
#4 Avoid “Heavy” Objects
Similar to still objects, heavy objects are not ideal in times of grief. Your emotions weigh on you enough, you do not need your home to be doing the same. If you have objects or symbols that are heavy (think art work with large rocks in it, very heavy furniture / accessories or lots of symbols or images of elephants around), consider removing these from your home or putting them in a place where you do not easily see them. Placing red tape around them or helps keep the energy of these heavy objects contained and not impacting you.
#5 Make Sure Doors Function Properly
The energy around grief is everchanging and unpredictable. For this reason, it is important the energy flow around you or the grieving person is as consistent and easy as possible – to be as supporting and comforting as possible. Doors are critical in proper energy flow in Feng Shui. Make sure all doors in the home can open easily, that they don’t stick when trying to open or close them, that they don’t creak and that they open and close fully (nothing behind them or hanging on the back of them unless it is pretty decor that doesn’t interfere with the door completely opening or closing.
#6 Put a Bell on the Front Door
Clearing space and moving energy around always helps in avoiding a feeling of stagnation. Placing a bell on your door is a great way to clear the “outside” energy every time you come “inside”.
#7 Add Objects, Imagery and Symbols that Move
It is just as important NOT to have still objects as it is to TO HAVE moving objects. Moving objects can be anything from a fan, to a wind up toy, to a fountain (great to place near your front door), to flags outside your house, to one of the many garden doo-dads that move with the breeze and so on. Moving objects ward off those not-so-pleasant feelings of stillness and the inability to move during times of grief.
#8 Add “Fire” Objects, Red and Triangles
Fire in Feng Shui is symbolic of high energy. In Feng Shui, fire is represented by actual fire itself (fireplaces, candles, BBQs, chimeneas, fire pits, etc.). It is also represented by the color red and triangle shapes. Add items that fit one or more of these characteristics in your home. They are especially good to add in the Fame & Reputation area of any room. To locate the Fame & Reputation area, go stand in the doorway of the room you want to Feng Shui. Look at the far wall and mentally divide this area into three equal (equal-ish) sized spaces. The middle space is the Fame & Reputation area – add your fire objects here.
#9 Remove Sad Things, Negative Imagery, “Downward” Objects and Bad Memories to the Extent Possible
When we feel down, sad or depressed the last thing we need is to be inadvertently surrounded by – down, sad and depressed objects. To help avoid this take a good look (a REALLY good look) at what you have around your house. What is the imagery? What is on the walls? Is it happy (good)? Is it of people who died a sudden death (not-so-good)? Is it of upward flowing energy (good) or downward flowing things (bad)? Does everything you look at remind you of good times (great) or of not-so-great times, people and events (bad)? Look really closely and to the extent possible, get rid of items that do not make you feel happy or put them in a place where they are not as easily seen.
#10 Make Sure You Have Good Lighting
Light can lift, lower and alter our moods dramatically. If you or someone around you is grieving, work to integrate significant light in the places where the most time is spent as well in the places and corners that seem unnaturally or uncomfortably dark. Also, make sure all of the lightbulbs are working!
#11 Open Windows and Curtains Often
Flush out old energy by letting new energy in – open your curtains / blinds daily and your windows as often as the weather allows.
#12 Add Plants, Lights, Living Things and “Up” Objects Near Ashes, Photos and Reminders of People Who Have Passed Away
Understandably, when we lose someone we like to keep many memories and photos of them, and sometimes even their ashes, around. These memories and items have considerable yin – or still energy. If you do have an area where you keep these memories or if they are in various places around the house it is a good idea to surround them with upward, light (in weight and in illumination) and alive energy. If you have the ashes of a person or pet, surround them with plants (ideally round-leafed and upward growing). You can also put them around brightly colored objects, moving objects, objects with sound, reminders from happy times and/or “upward” looking / feeling objects.
#13 Know that Clutter Keeps People Stuck Where They Are
Good energy flow – not too fast and not too slow – is critical at all times, especially when you are grieving. There is nothing that will screw up energy flowing better than clutter. It makes energy feel stuck, slow and unmotivated. Grief makes us have these emotions naturally. If someone you know is grieving and they are open to it – help them declutter the areas of their home where they spend the most time. Start with a corner or even a drawer – whatever feels the least overwhelming.
